Friday, January 27, 2012

Balance in Life (PBP wk 4)

Saturday, August 11, 2012 (4:40 pm)


In order to keep my sanity I must learn to balance my life... easier said than done.  

Balance is a fundamental aspect of a healthy lifestyle. It is also a hard thing to accomplish. How do you go about balancing every aspect of your life? Do Yogi's live eternally happy because they're stress free? Is it about time management? I personally can not find enough hours in a day to accomplish everything I set out to do; but then again, I have a tendency to procrastinate with each new task. Once I get the wheels turning however, it's hard to stop me; which is something I appreciate creatively and magically speaking. I know that I can be better, that I can be more strict with myself, I can micromanage; but the point is to learn to balance, not to accomplish. I'd like to be able to manage my life with as little stress as possible. I want to have a balanced love life, but for that, I first need to get a grip on my life. I don't think I know anyone that has it completely balanced & together; at least on the surface. You have success and power in the work area and a poor social life. Or an active social life, but no love life. Not that you need to find a partner to validate you. I was perfectly happy before love, happier when in love, and a hot mess after... hell, I'm still dealing with the aftermath.

Love can be the most powerful spiritual tool just as heartbreak can be the most damaging.

Family, work, finances, social, spiritual, physical, and mental aspects all affect your overall well being. If one area causes more stress, it throws the rest of your wheel off balance. It takes more of you, more time, and more energy. If you're not careful, it can completely destroy your life. I've been personally affected by an unbalanced lifestyle. I've let my issues affect me to the point where I had no hope left in me. Too much drama and negativity in the family & home, my personal life, career, absolutely everything was going downhill. Combine this energy with an unhealthy lifestyle and too much drinking, and you've got a recipe for destruction. It took me some time to learn to separate myself from all negative influence damaging my higher good.

I had to allow myself to let go of any issues that affected me mentally & spiritually. This is easier said than done; I dealt with depression for so long that I never thought I'd be able to say, I'm happy, again.

I have to admit that it wasn't until I began this path that I truly began to live. The more I learn about this spiritual path, the stronger I become. I have the tools within me to change what I don't like about my life. I can manifest the positive changes that will help and guide me to a prosperous tomorrow. The Law Of Attraction works, and once you change your way of thinking and let go of all the negative, you'll begin to see changes. It's really amazing. Of course, not everything can be accomplished with magick. There's also a need for actual hard work,;without the actions to support the magickal intention there can be no change. I need to prioritize my life. The rest will fall into place. I embrace the challenge that come with reaching my goals.This two of pentacles reminds me that I have what it takes to bring balance & harmony into my life, I have to make the choices. I just have to follow my intuition.

I need to find my personal balance.
As of last week, I was all bent out of shape over my romantic life. I allowed myself to lose focus. My energy was low because of this and I felt emotionally unstable. I've shaken that shiz-net off haha. If it's not helping me, it's damaging me. So, I've got to let go of any notions of love at the moment... at least while I pull myself together. It might be fun to have him back in my life, but he's not ready. I'm not ready. I need to guard my heart, I don't want another scar to mend. The first time around was hard enough. 

I must focus on me, and those that make me a better person. Change eating habits, get back on my fasting ritual, excercise more, work & study more. Focus on what makes me happy and balanced. Love is not in the mix, not yet anyway. I'm too emotionally involved with this guy to keep a clear focused path. I rather feel happy alone, than confused with him.
I need this energy to become my better self. ^_^  



Friday, January 20, 2012

Brooms & Besoms : The Quintessential Witch Tool (PBP wk 3)


I've always been drawn to movies and films that depict magick and witchcraft. Even as a child some of my favorite movies usually had some magickal component to them. As a young adult, I was drawn to movies like, The Craft, Hocus Pocus, and of course MY ALL TIME FAVORITE, Practical Magic (who DOESN'T love Practical Magic? I don't think I've ever met anyone -witch or muggle <- hehe yes, I love the Potter Series!- who doesn't love it.)

When I was searching for my 'B' word this week, the first thing that came to mind was that scene from PRACTICAL MAGIC where the ladies form a circle using their brooms to contain the possessed Nicole Kidman. This scene is so intense that it stayed with me even when I wasn't aware of how powerful a broom could be. I don't think I fully understood the relationship between the witch and her broom. It wasn't until I re watched the film as a new-born-witch that I understood the many elements that made this scene powerful & inspiring. 

Who doesn't immediately associate a witch with a broom, right? I think that by now the pointy hat and the broom are universal images for "witch."

The broom or bosom, is a tool of power. In WICCA: A Guide for the Solitary Practitioner, Cunningham writes, "Witches use brooms in magic and ritual. It is a tool sacred to both the Goddess and God."

As a woman, the broom represents love & care for the home. Brooms sweep away dirt in the mundane world as well as negative / unnecessary energies in the magickal world. They can be used to direct magick, sweep sacred space, or for protection.

I own multiple brooms, but I've always wanted an actual besom. A besom is a traditionally constructed broom made of a bundle of twigs tied to a stouter pole. But I've yet to find my perfect match.

A touch of country magic has a FANTASTIC selection of handmade brooms, their speciality is the cinnamon broom.

They quote Exodus on their site,

"Then the Lord said to Moses, " Take the finest spices: twelve pounds of liquid myrrh, half that amount (that is, six pounds) of sweet smelling cinnamon, six pounds of sweet smelling cane, and twelve pounds of cassia. Weigh all of these by the Holy Place measure. Also take four quarts of Olive oil, and mix all of these things like a perfume to make a holy olive oil. This special oil must be put on people and things to make them ready for service to God." Exodus 30:22-25-1

So, clearly it's a Christian base store...

I'd suggest that if you DO shop there ,don't mention you're magically inclined. he-he.
You see, my order was missing a small broom; when I contacted them via email they were extremely polite and offered to replace the missing item. After I replied with positive accolades over their amazing products, and casually mentioned that I'd be sharing their site with my magically inclined friends I never got a response nor a replacement. :/

I've yet to shop there again, but I've been meaning to get a handful of brooms and oils to give as housewarming / magickal gifts. It's the perfect gift to give someone you love; you can decorate it to personalize it and choose a scent according to the intent. Their products are of high quality. The brooms have a long lasting scent that penetrates the room for a while, plus you can always refresh them. They have an adequate selection of all natural oils, sandalwood, Cinnamon, myrrh, rosemary, lavender, clove, lemongrass, etc. Seriously, go take a look. I got most of the oils I use from this site.

I gave my family mini brooms for their cars prepared for protection on the road, and 24" brooms decorated for protection, prosperity, and love for their homes. They're the perfect little token of love.

I've been meaning to get one for myself, maybe it's time to shop brooms again!

If anyone shops there please comment and let me know how you like their products. :)

Friday, January 13, 2012

Positive Affirmations = Positive Growth (PBP wk 2)

May 10, 2012

I've discovered that the easiest way to reprogram your subconscious is through affirmations. I'll also admit that prior to experiencing affirmations first hand I was more than skeptical about them. I remember thinking affirmations were just part of the new-age-self-help movement. Hehe but that was waaay before I even got involved in the path.

I particularly remember this one episode of Sex & The City where Charlotte decided to attend a seminar to help her move on from her divorce and into finding true love. During the Q&A section she questioned why it wasn't working for her. The speaker immediately responded that Charlotte needed to do her affirmations. Carrie immediately intervened "oh believe ME, She's OUT THERE."
What we, as the audience didn't know at the time, was that Charlotte had true love stored in her future; that's the reason She hadn't come across Mr. Right.

Sometimes, we have to be patient. Good things are stored for us and they will come to us when we're ready, we just have to trust.
In the meantime, we must work with the law of attraction in order to attract what we desire into our lives --love, prosperity, and abundance.

When we're struggling in life and going through lean times, the default can sometimes be despair and negativity. We feel let down, lost and alone. We forget that sometimes things happen to teach us a valuable lesson.

The Universe, Divinity, Lord & Lady, God & Goddess, or Spirit, whatever higher force guides you, WANTS YOU to be happy.
The love stored within you, the love that surrounds you, the love that makes up every living & non living organism is the collective energy of the divine.

YOU ARE LOVED. YOU DESERVE TO BE LOVED. YOU DESERVE HAPPINESS AND BLISS.

You can have it, all you have to do is actively work with your self, using the tools given to you by Divinity to change your mindset, and change your life.


You can work with this energy by reaffirming daily what you want in your life. It's using the law of attraction together with positive affirmations to gather the energy necessary to bring forth your heart's desires. You put out good, happy, loving energy, and you attract it back.


The key to affirmations, at least for me, is quality not quantity.


It's breathing in what I want, full of love and trust while releasing with each exhale what no longer serves me -fears, anxieties, negative feelings.


It's visualizing what I want as I say each line, adding to the image positive emotions and love.


One of my go-to affirmations is one I found in one of my very first witchcraft/wicca 101 books. It resonated with me & I've continued to use it whenever I feel doubtful.

"I trust I am on a path to abundance and happiness, of gratitude and prosperity. 
I am peaceful, calm, filled with the certainty that all my days, from this day forward, are rich and splendid."

Or

"My mind body and spirit are strong. I go after my heart's deep desires. I can accomplish anything. I focus on my goals and have the strength to make them happen. I act in spite of my fears. I choose to be unstoppable."


As I say these affirmations, I imagine I'm on that path. I walk with each breath. I visualize. I trust.I am full of love. I manifest.


The feelings and emotions that back up my affirmations are there, vibrating within myself with each inhale & exhale. They increase in vibrancy until there's nothing but a full body hum.



Affirmations are as easy as rephrasing realistic wants/desires into present tense statements (written out as if you've already achieved your desire).

Repeat these statements with intent daily, or whenever you find the need to remind yourself of what you want, and enjoy the experience.
Say it with emotion, feel your desires manifest. Remember to always use positive words, the present tense, and the most important key: persistence.  

I've been listening to The Secret meditation. Its been only a week, but I've noticed I feel lighter, more energized, less annoyed. =p I need to get in the habit of doing it every night. I've tried to listen to the entire guided meditation but I simply cannot stay awake. I've combined this guided meditation with a chakra-aligning guided meditation that I'd been meaning to try. I've noticed that I definitely feel more grounded and centered.  I have more patience and wake up naturally on or around the time I set for myself the night before.

"I heal daily."

"I forgive and release."

"I am moving forward with love and trust."

"I am grateful for all that I have."

"My life is full of abundance."

"I am peace."

Friday, January 6, 2012

To Honor One's Ancestors ... (PBP wk 1)

 May 8, 2012
"If you look deeply into the palm of your hand, you will see your parents and all generations of your ancestors. All of them are alive in this moment. Each is present in your body. You are the continuation of each of these people.”

I have to admit that it wasn't until I began this path that I felt the linking connection with my Ancestors. There was so much going on at the time (mainly negative energies and crossings), that I didn't really know how to handle it. If it hadn't been for the Ancestors I don't know if I would've opened up about my beliefs; I doubt I would've come out of the broom closet (at least with my family and close friends).

About ten months ago, I'd just gotten back from an uncrossing ceremony lead by Marina (my mom's friend & Santeria priestess). We'd gone to the beach to leave offerings to Yemeya & Oshun (Siete Potencias sisters of the ocean and rivers). I wanted to share my experience with my friend Angel. Just as I got on the computer I realized the internet was down; I shrugged it off and thought to myself, "I'll just tell her later." At that exact second, I got a text update from Indigo Witch.

Her spirit message said "Selina who is in USA. There is a lady in spirit a grandmother or aunt. She says that you can achieve anything, do the course now and you will be very successful, dont hold yourself back :)"

At the time I shrugged the message off. I mean, that's not how my name is spelled, and quite honestly it didn't make much sense. What do you mean course? as in, an actual class? a road?

And yet, something kept nagging at me. Maybe it was the sudden surge of energy I felt when I opened the message, how I felt as if there were tiny little needless all over my body.  I couldn't let it go.


Landmark: La Catedral de San Luis Potosi.
My grandfather's family is originally
from San Luis Potosi.
I considered the message and wondered about the lady mentioned. I had no clue of who she could be, both of my grandmothers were alive. Then my grandfather came to mind (he passed in May 2009), he's the closest relative I've lost. Out of both sides of my family, I'd been closest to my mom's... closest to him. He used to call me "mi muñeca" ... "my doll."
Then my great grandmother came to mind. I remember bisabuela (great grandmother), she was kind and quiet. She had this wise look about her. My grandpa would take me to his parents where they would sit & talk, while I'd play with their chicks and roosters.
My bisabuela had this way about her, sort of a silent power about her. She didn't say much, but when She did, her advise was deep and wise. She was definitely a big role in my grandfathers life.

While I pondered over the message and it's meaning, I thought about the fact that my entire family speaks Spanish. I think I was half asleep when it hit me. It was as if I could see this lady in spirit explain her message with signs and hand motions. I mentally translated the message and realized it made way more sense to me in spanish.

"Selina que está en los EE.UU. Hay una señora en espíritu de una abuela o una tía. Ella dice que se puede lograr cualquier cosa, sigue ese curso y tendras mucho exito, no te detengas."

It was as if this bright lightbulb went off in my mind. The second the realization hit me, I knew I believed this. Now, whether that message was meant for me or not was not the key. What mattered was that through it, I'd found the link I was missing.

From Skull-a-Day blogspot
My grandfather's passing was hard on all of us. It all happened so suddenly. I blamed my grandmother for not taking care of him. Thinking about all he must've suffered had me in such a state, that for me, the easiest solution was to shut down. I mean, I didn't even get to say goodbye. I couldn't even attend the funeral. It hurt too much to deal.

Three months after my grandfather died, his oldest son passed in his sleep. It was a sad period for our entire family.
 
It wasn't until six months after my grandfather's death that I finally broke down again. I was staying with an uncle & his family (at home, things were difficult to say the least); they openly talked about my grandfather, something I wasn't too comfortable doing. I really admired my uncle's strength. He'd get up every morning and pray for both my grandfather and his brother. I couldn't understand how he could endure the pain. I avoided it at all costs.
If I'd allowed myself to mourn, it would've taken it all out of me. I simply wasn't ready. I didn't have it in me. I had enough dealing with other personal traumas. Then one night, I dreamt of him, my grandfather, "Mi Tito" (that was my nickname for him. In fact, because of me, the rest of my cousins refered to him by that name.)

We were at his house, I was sitting at the edge of his bed, he was standing as if nothing was the matter. He looked great, no wheelchair... a picture of perfect health. He sat next to me and held my hand. He didn't say a word. He just sat next to me.

My grandparents settled in Monterrey N.L.
I was born here.
I didn't ask him why he'd left me, I wasn't sad, I was simply enjoying the moment. We both laid back on the bed and sighted. It was so peaceful there. I remember thinking how quiet it was now that my grandma wasn't shouting (as She usually was). Tito agreed with a  knowing look hehe.

I remember wondering about my uncle, and then he came in the room with a glass of water. He seemed fine. Content. Accepting.
In this dream, mi Tito & I communicated without words.I knew what he was telling me, he knew of my concerns. He assured me that everything was fine... and I felt fine, at peace, happy to be with  him again. Happy to see that he was fine. We were home. The home I grew up in, the house he built with his bare hands. 

When I woke up the next day I felt happy and at peace. That evening, as I thought over the dream I broke down and cried. I cried so hard I couldn't breathe, I cried because I missed him, because I'd seen him, because he was happy, and because I felt so happy while with him again. I mourned him, finally, and exactly 6 months on the day of his passing. It was emotionally cathartic.

This dream happened well over two years ago and I remember it clearly.
It was because of this dream that I opened up again, I allowed myself to miss him. To think of him, talk to him. I wanted him in my life, even if he could no longer be in it physically.

The realization that my ancestors were a constant part of my life changed my relationship with them. They've helped me during spells (coming up with, and improvising protective spells), they've helped me get rid of a pesky spirit that was messing with my sanity, my Grandfather Tito has been present to comfort me when I've needed support and guidance. They call for my attention when I need to take something into consideration, they're a part of me. They are present in my every day...  

My Dia De los Muertos Altar
(October 30th -November 2)
For DIA DE LOS MUERTOS / Samhain / Halloween I created an altar to honor my ancestors and those that passed not too long ago.

I must admit that I had to pull an all nighter to finish this one on time. The base of it consists of a bunch of strategically placed boxes and pieces of wood.
It's supposed to be way more colorful, but under the circumstances, I think it turned out pretty cool.

This was my very first celebration of Dia de los Muertos. My family appreciated my efforts. I was so proud of myself, I faced death and accepted it... finally. 

I honestly can not wait for this year's Dia de los Muertos. I want to make the altar bigger and way more colorful. I want to honor my ancestors as well as other spirits that I admire. i.e. Friday Kahlo, Alex Haley, Princess Diana, Marilyn Monroe, Pope John Paul II, and other saints that are a big part of my path.

Tito has made other appearances in my dreams since that first time two years ago, if he's not physically present in my dreams, his presence is always there. I'm always sooo happy to see him. He came to me in a dream again about two weeks ago. My mom had given me an old t-shirt that belonged to him, and this made me regret not getting the chance to hug him one last time (Because of the circumstances, spending time with him was impossible, and so I didn't get to hug him one last time.) I held onto this shirt and cried for a bit, telling him that I wish I could hug him.

Two nights later, he appeared in my dreams. He was wearing an army green uniform and looked as handsome as ever. The dream was a bit chaotic in itself, but the second Tito appeared everything else came into a stop. He was smiling and I could feel how radient his spirit was. He was telling me once again that he'd taken care of everything. That I shouldn't worry, everything would be just fine. He hugged me then, and I held on to him as long as I could. I could feel his arms around me, his protective energy surrouding me. I was so happy. The next day I woke with him on my mind and the brightest most purest smile I've experienced in a while. Even thinking about it now is making me happy. ^_^

Up until recently I didn't even know how important the dream world is in this path. I'm really great in the dream world I must admit, I have full control, I'm aware of my surroundings, sometimes I explore but other times, I let the dreams show me what I need to see.

This is my Ancestors Altar
I know that my ancestors are present, my dreams have become an important link to them. I work with them and ask them for help when I'm in need and they always deliver. They are here and they help me protect my family. It's amazing.

I really love how this altar came together. A close friend brought me the Aztec Calendar from his last trip to Mexico City. The paper is hand made and full of detail!

I held onto this forever, never really finding a place for it or a purpose. One thing was for sure, I knew I felt an intense connection to it and I dragged it along from place to place as I moved. When I was setting up my room I stuck it to the wall as a mere decoration. This shelf is right above my bed, I wanted it mainly for my books. I don't even know how it became my Ancestors Altar but I'm so glad that's what it's become.

Things just came together organically, as every altar does. Every single item connects me with my past, I honor them daily, I make constant offerings and I share with them my meals. 


I love my ancestors. I am them, and they are me. They want me to be happy, they want their bloodline to be happy.